This week...

What a WEEK! I know, this means much less to you than to me, but I'm tempted to list, here, the events of the week, because it's a whopper. How about one DAY, then? Tuesday...

7am The boys have been up and going for almost half an hour, and we all eat breakfast together.
7:30 I get all the school stuff ready for the day, and make a few copies of the skeletal system to label.
8am Or something like it... we start school. We are trying to get all our work done (Bible, grammar, handwriting, journals, math, reading and science) before lunch, because that's when things start to spin...
1pm We have a late lunch, and then
1:30 Tate and I zip up to the school for Sign Language class
2:00 Tate wants to walk home alone (big boy!) which is great because I have to get to a...
2:30 Dr. appointment, with the ENT (more later), and the grocery store, and get home in time for
4:30 Tate practices on one field, and Gunnar practices at a different location, until...
5:30 We rush home, get all the sweaty boys showered and dressed, then (a treat!)
6pm We leave the house, and eat dinner OUT (!) at Arby's, on our way to
7pm Church, for a 5-week class we are taking. The kids get to play games with a bunch of other kids. This gets done at
8:15... or 8:30 And the boys are wound up, and it's a 20 minute drive home to get the boys calmed, teeth-brushed, jammied, and IN BED!

That is NOT how I normally choose to live life!

And here's the irony... I was asked to speak at a MOPS group this morning (Mothers of Pre-Schoolers), and the topic had to do with lies we believe. One of them being, "There's not enough time to do all the things I need to do". So I had been mulling this over, for the last few days, because I constantly feel like this. (I want a secretary! Ha ha ha....) But the TRUTH is, there is always enough time for what GOD wants me to do today. There may NOT be enough time for things that I think I should do, or that other people think I should do, but there's enough time for HIS plan.

So, frankly, Tuesday alarmed me. But guess what? It went great :0) His agenda.

Sunday School Kids #4

If you died today, and God met you at the entrance to heaven and said, “Why should I let you in?” What would you say?

Because I am a cristien.
Because I am a chritan
I don’t deserve it.
I am a Christian and I should get Eturnall life in heaven because many, many years ago you said so!
You should chose! Becase you are the hevanly farther! But I am a Christian and I think, I think yes, but I know I don’t diserve it. Sordove!

The thankful list... #6

Tate is normal. And he is very, very Hard of Hearing.

Some of my new friends, with much littler HoH kiddos, have left questions or comments about how he does in activities, school, or sports with regular hearing kids.

In a word, great :0)

I was pretty naive when he got diagnosed, and didn't worry about a lot of things that might have caused me alarm. I just assumed he would be able to do well at whatever he wanted. There have been challenges, to be sure, but he's a trooper! Of course, as a mom I'm always second-guessing. Am I pushing too hard? Am I giving him too much slack? Are my expectations fair? Am I babying him? But then, Tate being the middle boy is a good thing, because he's right in there with his brothers :0)

It helps that his favorite sport is soccer, which (at least with little boys) doesn't involve a lot of communication on the field! And it helps that he has two brothers who don't treat him any differently than anyone else. And it really helps that he is so, well, Tate. He's just one of my boys :0) This is what I wrote, a few weeks ago, to one of the moms...


Yes, Tate and his brothers are pretty normal... whatever that is. ;-)

They think burping is a competitive sport, make it their mission in life to dismantle my living room and my sanity, and 'work' in dirt the way some artists work in oils. They all play soccer, avoid vegetables, and wiggle and squirm in church, when they don't fall asleep on my shoulder. They think that 3 or 4 hours a day of homeschool is cruel and unusual punishment, but the 18 hours of daylight in summer is impossibly short ("Mom, the day just went by in a whizz-buzz!")

For the most part, Tate does it all just fine. But sometimes he needs a little more support. Mostly it's me that needs to not take for granted that he is "getting" everything, and to be patient with repeating and explaining.

Little things make all the difference. Like waiting until the squeaky screen door finishes closing before I say whatever I need to say. Or repeating things in a different way, rather than just saying the same thing he didn't get the first time.

And here's one you might not realize yet - making sure that he 'gets' even the language that is NOT directed at him. That's how we learn a LOT of our language and vocabulary - by overhearing things that are not always said TO us. If the other kids can overhear it, Tate deserves to be able to hear it too. The hardest time for this is in the car. My husband and I will be in the front talking to each other, and the other boys can hear us (but don't care). And Tate can tell we're talking but can't make out what we're saying because of all the road noise, and gets really frustrated.

Oh my, I have really developed a "projecting" voice! And enunciating my words clearly! (Okay, really, I'm getting to have a voice like a foghorn sometimes and have to remember who I'm with and where I am!)

Oh, I too am VERY thankful for the technology of this day and age! Woo-hoo! I LOVE Tate's HA! Probably not as much as he does :0)

Also, the school provided an FM for use there, and we have a personal FM (at home) as well. Don't use it much now that we are home-schooling, but on outings it's a huge benefit. Bike rides can be scary because with the wind whistling in his HA and the helmet buffering traffic sounds I really worry - so we use the FM. Or if we're in a big crowded space (like visiting the Science Center) I can get his attention from across the room. And soccer! Tate couldn't hear the coach or the referee, so we started using the FM for soccer. Now I have to discipline myself not to 'micro-coach' him!

Tate has been losing hearing since we discovered his loss. There were clues earlier - disinterested in me reading to him (too quiet) and videos (because I always kept the volume low), but really he was coping so well, we couldn't tell he had hearing loss until I realized he couldn't talk (hear!) on the phone.

Also, he was a wanderer. Not that he would run away from me (defiance) but he would just launch out. Who knows if that's just his confident personality or due to not being engaged in what was going on because he wasn't hearing it well enough.

We use a combination of WHATEVER WORKS for communication. I guess there can be REALLY strong opinions out in the deaf community regarding communication choices, but my 'm.o.' is WHATEVER IS WORKING!

We had actually been doing a little bit of signing long before we realized Tate was HoH. I had a friend who did it with her kids, and it just eliminated a whole lot of whining and pointing. Worked for my kids too. They could sign "more" or "milk" or "all done" long before they could say those things. I think we used: please, thank you, water, milk, sorry, more, all done, and just 3 or 4 more, really. But it helped.

What we do isn't really ASL or SEE, but more of "sign supported speech". Tate does really well with his HA in a quiet environment. Of course, he is lip- and face-reading a LOT. But in a noisy environment or at a distance we try to throw some signs in there with the words to give him more clues. When your kiddo hears English word order, it's confusing to do ASL word order. But I don't use all the SEE sign word modifiers.

We were camping last weekend and he was running around in big clunky (cracked and leaky!) rain boots. I was trying to call to him to come get his shoes but he had no idea. If you say "shoe", "you", "too", "do", "chew"... your face looks about the same. But all I had to do was sign "come" and "shoes" with the words, and he was right there.

Things I am REALLY thankful for:

* Tate doesn't seem to have any self-consciousness about his HA or hearing loss.

* I haven't known about any instances of him being teased. There have been some children who were less than tactful in asking about the HA and what's going on, but they weren't really mean-spirited, just clueless.

* When he first got HA's (he used to wear two) I was worried that he would randomly take them out and lose them. Apparently some kids do. But once he got used to them he NEVER wanted them out!

* And - Bonus Round! - he's my best sleeper. Take the HA out and turn the lights off and Tate is just gone. He slept through a four hour electrical storm, the likes of which I have never seen before in this state!

* Though it took awhile, (later than my first child), Tate has become an excellent reader. This is HUGE for HoH/Deaf kids because it keeps them exposed to good language, vocabulary, grammar, etc. I read recently that the average reading level for deaf ADULTS in America is third grade. Not good. And even for graduates of Gallaudet, the average was a seventh grade reading level. Still not very good. We REALLY do a lot of reading :0) I prayed and prayed for him to learn to read, because he struggled with it. Don't know if that is a 'deaf' issue with him, or - again - just a Tate issue.

* Tate is one of the most persistent, persevering, hard-working people I have ever known. Well, darn it, he's just plain stubborn and bull-headed sometimes (!) but I'm looking at the bright side.

* And I love his sense of humor. Gets us all through rough spots.

But oh my, the NOISE. Tate is a boy of noise. He truly believes that making all sorts of sound-effect noises is a gift, straight from God. At least Tate is never hard to find. You can nearly always hear him.

You will have an interesting life :0)

God bless,

Julie




It also helps that Tate embraces life with uncontainable exuberance!

Susannah Wesley

On one of the blogs I check in with at times there was a conversation about child discipline. I left a comment which mentioned dealing differently with childish foolishness and mistakes, as opposed to defiance. So, anyone not in on that conversation (and not interested!) can pass this right by, but for anyone who cares, the ideas was expressed by Susannah Wesley (mother of SEVENTEEN - including John and Charles Wesley) like this:


In order to form the minds of children, the first thing to be done is to conquer the will, and bring them into an obedient temper. To inform the understanding is a work of time, and must with children proceed by slow degrees as they are able to bear it; but the subjecting of the will is a thing which must be done at once, and the sooner the better!

For by neglecting timely correction, they will contract a stubbornness and obstinacy, which is hardly ever after conquered, and never without using such severity as would be painful to me as to the children. In the esteem of the world, those who withhold timely correction would pass for kind and indulgent parents, whom I call cruel parents, who permit their children to get habits, which they know must afterward be broken. Nay, some are so stupidly fond as in sport to teach their children to do things, which in the after while, they must severely beat them for doing.

Whenever a child is corrected it must be conquered; and this will be no hard matter to do, if it be not grown headstrong by too much indulgence. And, if the will of a child is totally subdued, and if it be brought to revere and stand in awe of the parents, then a great many childish follies and inadvertencies may be passed by. Some should be overlooked and taken no notice of, and others mildly reproved. But no willful transgressions ought ever to be forgiven children, without chastisement, more or less as the nature and circumstances of the offense shall require.

I cannot dismiss this subject. As self-will is the root of all sin and misery, so whatever cherishes this in children insures their after wretchedness and faithlessness. Whatever checks and mortifies, promotes their future happiness and piety. This is still more evident if we further consider that Christianity is nothing less than doing the will of God, and not our own; that the one grand impediment to our temporal and eternal happiness being this self-will. No indulgence of it can be trivial, no denial unprofitable.


Not exactly anything like what you'll hear at most parenting classes or forums today!

Soccer Saturday

As usual, for our family at this time of year, all the boys played soccer on Saturday. Of course, sign ups are in balmy, lovely, sunny July. The boys are excited, we look forward to cheering our kids on, chatting with the other parents, and picnicking between games, out at the soccer fields.

We must be delusional.

Because what we most often get is rain. Or wind. Or both. We huddle under umbrellas when it's not too windy to use them, proudly wear our "team color" underneath our raincoats, and try to dry out our soggy feet in the car, while we eat lukewarm macaroni and cheese from a thermos between games.

Let me just clarify that these pictures were NOT taken yesterday. Bringing a camera was the last thing on my mind yesterday.

I thought I would be smart and just send Kerry with Wyatt because he had an early game. For whatever reason, it always seems to be 10 degrees colder at the soccer field than it is at my house.

But the weather was just fine! Okay, cloudy, but no wind or rain. Wyatt's team lost, which is frustrating for reasons I won't go into, but we're focusing on being gracious winners and gracious losers, so it's a good training opportunity and he seemed to handle it well.

Gunnar and Tate's games were much later, and back to back. And the wind was rising. Gunnar's team actually plays four mini-games rather than one hour-long game. The "home" team gets to stay put, but the "away" team has to rotate from field to field. We were the "away" team. The funny thing is that the "home" teams get to choose which end of the field they want to play, and not one of the four teams we played had figured out that kicking INTO the wind is a disadvantage. Oh well, whoever said 7-year-olds were big on strategy? We'll take whatever help we can get!

Gunnar did really well - played where he was supposed to play, paid attention to where the ball was, kicked it more than once at a time (!), and even had "breakaway" and would've scored... if yet another teammate hadn't enthusiastically "helped" him. *sigh* But he didn't complain :0) Nobody officially keeps score at this level, but I'm pretty sure they won 3 and either tied or won the 4th. I was a little distracted.

We went right from Gunnar's game over to Tate's field. They were playing a team that beat them two weeks ago. (Tate's team had a double-header, and played this team second.)

The wind came up, the rain came down, and it was - dare I say it - MISERY! But I think Tate's team, the "Jaguars", may actually play their finest under rotten conditions. It was raining so hard, and blowing so hard, it actually felt like hail. It was hard to look into the wind. Tate never even subbed out. I'm sure he was tired, but all that running kept him warm. I've never seen him play better, and told him so :0)

They managed to finish their game, in spite of two dads having to hold down the goal the other team was defending, after it blew over twice (!), and won :0) Again, winning isn't everything, but it was fun to beat a team we had lost to, and even more fun to see the boys really playing a fine game.


Kerry managed to get a parking space right next to the field. When the rain began, we bundled Wyatt and Gunnar into the 4Runner.

By the second half of the game, Kerry joined them.


Therefore, I am presenting myself, and all the other soccer moms (including the one who wore FLIP FLOPS - you know who you are) this prestigious award:

Sunday School Kids #3

God is always… (give me three things)

Powrfle, strong, and unbtebl
He’s all powerful, He died on the cross
Right, omnipotent, omnipresent
God is always good, truthful, true
Loving, kind, caring
Listening, waching, working, loving, magnefaset, powerfull.
Kind, forgiveing, loving, careing
Almity and wonderful

Hearry Maids are cool... #5

If Tate has been teased about HA's or his hearing loss, I'm not aware of it. I haven't seen it happen and he has never mentioned it to me. I guess, if he HAS been teased he either isn't aware of it, or it was just water off a duck's back. There was a girl in Wyatt's kindergarten class that asked him repeatedly why he wore those blue "earrings"... ironically, a girl who wore glasses, but couldn't make the connection. But she wasn't mean - just not terribly bright or tactful.


I'm thankful that once Tate adjusted to the HA's, there was no turning back. We didn't have to put cords and clips on them, because he didn't WANT to take them out, and he was old enough not to chew on them :0)

In fact, at our house, "Hearry Maids" are COOL. And if you don't have your own, we'll make you some!

Listen to the birds and bees...

I mentioned this in an earlier post, and went looking and found the link. If you are interested in trying to identify birds or bugs you have heard, or want to know what a particular one sounds like, or just want to listen to some interesting nature sounds, try these:

Bird Songs

Bugs, Birds, and other assorted noises

Orca whales

Learn to recognize different pods



Have fun :0)

Cute....

It was Weird Hair Night at AWANA.

Yes, Gunnar got a point.

He's now also sporting a "Hiker" patch and a silver crown with a jewel. (And, yes, still wearing his cast/brace, for one more week.)

Yeaaaa, Gunnar!

More spiders...

Yes, the boys are STILL all about spiders. I thought we were done, but apparently, they didn't. Especially since Kerry saw one of those frighteningly huge (but probably harmless) Giant House Spiders on the wall of his office. He quickly called the official spider catcher: Tate.

After catching it, the boys decided they needed a crane fly, to feed to the spider. Now, there are two spiders in the jar, who are trying very hard to avoid each other, and the remains of the crane fly. Yuck.

Trouble is, the Giant House Spider (harmless) and the Hobo Spider (less common, but not so harmless) look very much alike to mere mortals, like me. Yikes.

BUT, here's the saving grace to this...

We are also reading about Japan, for our history, this week. So the boys have composed these Haiku. About spiders.

Huge hairy spider
He pounces, he bites, he eats
A gruesome display.

The boys all wrote that one together, with Wyatt contributing the last line. He then declared that line "copyrighted" and wrote another Haiku, on his own:

"Jumping Spider"
He stalks a crane fly
He lunges, then he lunches
A gruesome display.

Wyatt also wrote this one:

"Brown Spider"
It seems he's tired
He doesn't move very much
Except when he's scared.

And the boys, together, (mostly Tate) wrote:

Big furry spider
Lying in wait on the wall,
Now caught in my jar.