Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Homeschool Bennies #3

But aren't you worried about socialization?

Yes, very, that's why we homeschool!

We are free to dance to the beat of a different drummer,
because our number one goal is not
"to fit in".

I've been reading a wonderfully encouraging book by R. C. Sproul called When You Rise Up.  If I could say it as well as he does, I would.  But let's be honest ;D  In the words of R. C. ...

There are two objections left that I am aware of, one from the left, and one from the right. The one from the left is the granddaddy of them all: What about socialization?” Before we begin to look at that question let’s consider once again what the Bible tells us. It tells us that it equips us for every good work. It tells us that we are to raise our children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. But it not only doesn’t tell us how to socialize our children, but doesn’t tell us that they should be socialized There is no commandment from God 'Thou Shalt socialize thy children.' In fact I’m sometimes a little unclear as to what it is these objectors are seeking for my children. What does it mean to be socialized?

Sometimes I ask those who raise this objection, “Now when you speak of socialization, you’re talking about my child’s ability to get along with others who are different. Is that it? Usually I get some sort of affirmative response, “I see,” I go on, “and your solution is for my ten-year-old to spend seven hours a day stuck in a room with other ten-year-olds?” My daughter Darby interacts with different kinds of people far more than any child at a state school. She interacts every day with her mommy and daddy. I’m not like a ten-year-old girl at all. She spends hours on end with her eight-year-old brother Campbell. She “socializes” with her sister Delaney (five). She reads to her sister Erin Claire (three), and she often gets her sister Maili (one) out of her crib in the morning. Not only that, but for the past six years Darby has been part of a mainstreaming program during the school year and during her nonschool days. She interacts with her special needs little sister Shannon.

She does have friends from church, not because we schedule “socialization” time for her, but because our family is friends with all the families in the church. She interacts with the therapists who come to help Shannon every week. She interacts with the folks at the grocery store, at the post office, and at the Highlands Study Centre. She visits with and serves visiting missionaries and their families. Next month she will be interacting with Korean Christians as she travels with her dad to Seoul, where he will be teaching.

But this isn’t really what people mean by socialization. What they want for my daughter Darby is for her to be hip to all the things other ten-year-olds are concerned about, like fashion labels, television shows, pop singers, and other essentials to the good life. They are concerned that my daughter is not under the sway of Madison Avenue, that she is free. But I have none of that concern. Their identity is in Christ. Not in pop culture.
 Makes me want to stand up and shout AMEN.  You?


Felicity said...


melanie said...


leah said...

The biggest general "objection" I hear about home schooling is the socialization one. That book raises a lot of good points! I have many (many, many) good friends here who homeschool their kids - and I have to say that their children are some of the kindest, most self-assured kids that I know. My friend's daughter Gwen is like a little mother hen - she always reads to Matthew and helps Nolan on the playground, etc. when we're all together. I just love her wonderful perspective on life - she's not the "typical" self-involved teen.

Herding Grasshoppers said...

Yah, it cracks me up. Sure, I've met some socially awkward homeschoolers. And guess what? I've met some socially awkward public and private schoolers, too. And some socially awkward adults. Sheesh.

But maybe a lot of it is our expectations. Like you (Leah) said about your friend's daughter - she's not "typical". And that can be a really good thing :D

Cutzi said...

One of my favorite books ever. A must read for home schoolers and non home schoolers alike.